While I take a little break before going into the next chapter of Pagan Christianity, I believe that it is time to just take a few moments and share some things from my heart.
At this present moment, my spirit is raised, as I had the most precious benefit of working, today, with a brother who lives in the neighborhood.
It was really great hearing this brother share his heart about some things that were important to him…, things concerning the Lord, life, church,…everything.
Today our conversation just seemed to be a little more focused,…a little more real if you will.
He was stressing the need for brothers and sisters to feel safe to share their hearts and feelings as well as their insights and convictions.
He spoke about how we need to submit ourselves to one another, and be willing to hear what is being said, and even be willing to take criticism from one another.
He is right.
Fact is, many of us aren’t very good at being gentle. I really don’t know where I am on the ‘meekness’ spectrum, but my guess is on a scale from one to ten, I’m maybe a three (but probably a one).
Lot’s of rough edges still.
The phone rang this evening and it was a sister, whom is new to the neighborhood, inviting my daughters to her daughters birthday party. My heart was lightened just a bit as I realized that, even though we don’t know each other that well, she was willing to invite my family into their lives.
Another phone call, and it was a brother telling me that he would do whatever he could in order to help out with a certain situation that we are facing as a family ( don’t let your imagination go to far here, it’s nothing out of the ordinary, just private).
I felt cared for.
And then his wife calls about 45 minutes later asking me if I can bring her two sons home for school on a certain day of the week.
I felt needed.
In the midst of a subculture that is so hung up on trying to be spiritual, or knowledgeable, or even biblical, I am coming to realize something more and more.
God is not merely about God. In fact, a good way to express Gods nature would be ‘Self for others’ (thanks brother Grubb).
I’m not talking about an ‘all about me‘ gospel. Rather, I’m talking about a ‘we are one’ gospel.
God is for us, and likewise, we are for God. But the way this is expressed most truly is when we love one another.
So what else is on my mind?
That I need to leave people alone. I need to let people just do what they want to do without feeling responsible for fixing them. I wish that I were a more accepting person, one who is better at making that distinction between the sin and the sinner.
I need to learn how to shine light without poking someone in the eye with it.
I also wish that I were more honest and open about my thoughts and feelings, but in a more positive way.
And there are other things too…
I wish that everyone else desired these things as well, and that we would all actually grow into them.
I wish that we weren’t all so busy chasing dreams and illusions, but instead simply following the will of God, loving Him and one another as ourselves.
I wish we weren’t all so hung up on who we think we are, but instead begin to just be who we really are.
I’m tired of being a rock.
I want to be a gem.
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